


Together

by SageMcMae



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: F/M, Force Bond (Star Wars), Love/Hate, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-15
Updated: 2017-12-22
Packaged: 2019-02-15 03:48:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 21,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13022604
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SageMcMae/pseuds/SageMcMae
Summary: Kylo's arms rode up her back, causing her night-shift to catch slightly as it rose above her knees. He placed his palms flat against her, holding her close. His breathing was more even now. He shifted his forehead up, pressing his nose against her waist. Rey felt the twinge of a tickling sensation growing. A tale about the two halves coming together. (Canon Divergence with TLJ)





	1. Part I

**Together - Part I  
**

It had started on Takodana. That blasted western territory that belonged to Maz Kanata, was where Kylo Ren had first laid eyes on her. Up until that moment in the woods, he had only known her as "the girl." She had quickly became so much more than that. Unlike many he had chased before, she fought back. She was afraid, oh yes, she had been deliciously afraid of him. Cloaked in all black, wearing his famed helmet, and not uttering a word to her until he had her cornered — it was all rather dramatic and mysterious. He believed his grandfather would have been proud.

He had sensed her the second they landed. While the fight raged around him, he had honed in on her signature, unmistakably pure, made of the most innocent light. Ordering the stormtroopers to leave him, he had sought her out alone. "The girl" couldn't possibly outrun him. It had been easy enough to track her. He had briefly wondered what had caused her to venture out alone. The thought had left him as soon as it had come. His mission was to extract the information from her, find the droid, and return with the Skywalker map.

Simple enough.

Their meeting turned out to be anything but simple. Or enough.

She was quick, much faster than he was at moving through the ravine and brush. Her thin limbs carried her so swiftly, like a bird breaking through the treetops toward the unending blue sky. He watched her scale a rock formation, scurrying away from him when she realized her blaster was of little use. There was no time for him to admire her natural skill. Summoning the force, he had put a stop to her escape, freezing her where she stood.

Unleashing his lightsaber, he had questioned her about the droid. Her attention had been stuck on the burning red blade, focused on its energy. All the while he had been observing her. Each shiver of her body, each hitch of her breath, every inconsistent thought that screamed through her mind — he felt a strange draw towards her. There was an unyielding spirit to her. Kylo respected that. It was rare to find in this universe. He had witnessed so many abandon their beliefs, their loyalties, their very soul for one more breathe of life. Selfish, vain creatures that they were. She had done none of those things. She never pleaded. She never begged. She never yielded. It had been ages since he had stalked such captivating prey. He determined it was that and nothing more.

When he had heard of the increased support of the Resistance, he had decided it was in his best interest to take her. Kylo had ignored the small part of himself that found a selfish satisfaction in his choice. He had used the force to knock her unconscious, scooping her up effortlessly and carrying her away. Everyone on the base feared him. He knew without a doubt not a single one of the weak-minded Stormtroopers would raise an eyebrow at his motives. There was only one who would.

Hux. That damned meddling general had always been a thorn in his side. However, as Kylo had rose in both power and favor with the Supreme Leader, Hux had grown more and more intent on undermining him. Kylo would have to be extremely cautious when entering the Starkiller base with his prey. She was certain to draw a few questions from the general. He would need to be efficient in his extraction of information to avoid any further complications with his nemesis.

While the ship had returned to the base, he had sat motionless in his seat, flanked by Stormtroopers. The girl remained in his arms, her breathing soft and feather light against him. Even under his many layers, his skin bristled at the sensation. He flinched, immediately irritated by the feeling.

"Move." He ordered a set of troopers. They scattered from the bench next to him. He laid her down, taking care to keep her face in his direct line of view.

"Sir, shall I put the prisoner in cuffs?" One of the Stormtroopers brought forth two pairs of binds, one for her wrists, and one for her ankles.

"There's no need," he grumbled, waving the man away. All of them seemed to take the hint to leave him alone.

After a few minutes, he removed his helmet, allowing himself to scan her face with his own naked eye. Her skin was tanned from long hours out in the sun. He noticed the speckling of freckles across the bridge of her nose, splaying out along her cheeks. She was thin, almost sickeningly so. However, she was strong, much stronger than he had anticipated. Her aura was vibrant, even in her unconscious state. Her light was positively blinding. Despite himself, he felt drawn to it, like a moth to a flame.

Kylo set his helmet down on his lap, regarding her with another side-long glance. She had naturally curled in on herself, a clear sign she as used to being alone and vulnerable. He reached out to her mind, easily finding answers to his most pressing questions, though the search was entirely selfish and had nothing to do with the orders he had received. The more he dug, the more intrigued he became.

Then he saw him — Han Solo — his father had brought the girl to Maz's castle. He was doting on her, treating her as if she was his daughter. Han mentioned the Force, discussing his skepticism, a belief Kylo remembered from an early age. His father had never been one to buy into the power that surged through his veins, even denied his own wife's capabilities. He was more ease around those like him, outcasts, ruffians — then there was this girl. She had made an impact on him with her expert mechanical knowledge, earning some of his highest praise. Kylo felt his hands clench into fists at her happy memory, so full of joy and admiration. Of course she would admire Han Solo, the infamous smuggler, the rebel who helped bring down the Death Star, the criminal who married a princess. It must had been like a fairy tale come true to her. She had no idea how wrong she was about the man.

Apparently she was not a good judge of character, because the next person he saw in her mind was FN-2187.  _Traitor_ , Kylo's thought hissed across his own mind, as his fists shook at his sides. He watched as the ex-Stormtrooper lied to the girl, told her that he was with the Resistance. Even Kylo's scruffy, nerf-herder of a father had seen through that act, but not the girl. She wasn't unintelligent. No, he had seen she was capable of survival in some backwater trash of a planet, which made her both resourceful and clever. However, she did have an uncanny and annoying habit of seeing only the good in others. She was so hopeful.

 _Hope_ , he scoffed. Another Resistance lie. There was no such thing. There was only chaos or order. The rebels thrived on chaos. They needed it. He preferred everything to have its place and run on time. The First Order would bring structure and organization to the galaxy. They would end the rebellion. They would build peace instead of spouting useless speeches and false beliefs to appease nations for a time, until it all fell back into chaos.

Perhaps he could convince the girl to join them. She had impressed him enough during their short encounter for Kylo to consider her worthy of the regime. If the Supreme Leader didn't order him to execute her, he'd contemplate asking her. The idea was tempting and he couldn't stop himself from running a further examination of her mind. What he uncovered led him to believe it was a lost cause. He doubted she would switch sides. She was terribly naive. However, Kylo had never shied away from a challenge. He could be rather persuasive, when the occasion called for it.

Backing out of her mind, he returned his helmet to its rightful place, concealing his face as he attempted to also conceal his motives for kidnapping the girl — this scavenger from Jakku. And that was where it had all started.

That was the first time they were together.

* * *

Rey was enveloped in darkness. Her body felt weightless as it drifted through the oblivion. She had forgotten why she was running, forgotten what she was looking for, forgotten it all. Here she was alone, but she wasn't frightened. The black comforted her, held her close, kept her safe and hidden. There was no pain. There was no disappointment. She was safe.

Safe.

That title didn't sound right. She scrunched up her face. The dark shifted, sensing her consciousness coming forward. Her head was swimming with memories, thoughts, feelings…some of which she didn't know to be hers.

She had felt the presence of another before she had opened her eyes. At first, she believed herself to be dreaming. When she did break through the dizzying collection, she jumped. The clacking sound of metal on metal jarring her from her softer dreamscape into the reality she found herself in.

The chair, if you could call it that, to which she was bound was made of pure steel. The cold began seeping into her skin through her garments, adding to the chill of the vented air in the room. Glancing down at her bound limbs, she had started to feel her survival instincts kick in. Eyeing the shackles, she tried to make sense of where the binds were the weakest and where she might apply leverage to break them open. Her thoughts were shut-down prematurely, as the growing awareness that she as being watched became too powerful. It forced her to look over to the masked villain who had assaulted her outside Maz's castle.

He was hunched over on the floor, probably kneeling, his head inclined up to stare at her. For how long he had waited in that position for her to awaken, she was unsure. It was unnerving to know he had probably been with her the entire time she had been unconscious.  _Creep_ , she immediately thought, feeling the urge to lunge forward and kick that despicable piece of metal off of his head.

"Where am I?"

She heard him breath through the oscillator, as if he was stifling a chuckle. "You're my guest."

 _Poor choice of words_ , she thought, as she watched him watching her. "Where are the others?" she asked, noting how her voice came out a bit stronger this time.

"You mean the murders, traitors, and thieves you call friends? You'll be relieved to hear, I have no idea."

How dare he? How dare he take her away from her first real friends? From a job offer? From a place she could have returned to one day and called home? She had planned on going back to Jakku, yes, in order to find answers about her parents. Once she had that, she could rejoin Han and Chewie, take him up on his offer, earn some money to help her search. She could travel the galaxy, if she had to, in order to find them. Perhaps she'd be lucky enough to run into Finn again. He had been so kind to her, like the older brother she had never had. Perhaps they would see each other again. First she had to get out of here…wherever here was.

Rey mustered up her best defiant glare.

He tilted his head at her, as if her gaze had been a verbal retort he found amusing. "You still want to kill me?"

"That happens when you're being hunted by a creature in a mask," she snapped.

Wordlessly, he reached up, engaging the release mechanism in his helmet and in one swift movement, discarding it from his face. He stood as he removed the metal accessory, showcasing his full height. She recalled him being tall, menacing when he had chased her on Takodana. Seeing him standing before her now gave her new appreciation for just how much larger than her he truly was.

Rey forgot to breathe for a second. Her focus had gone to his face. He was much younger than she had envisioned upon hearing his altered voice. He looked as though he was not much older than her, with shoulder length raven hair and piercing eyes. He wasn't classically handsome. His nose and his ears were disproportioned for his face, but she found him attractive none-the-less. It was an unwanted and inappropriate thought, considering her current predicament. Regardless, one realization reigned true. The man in front of her was definitely not what she had been expecting.

They regarded one another in silence. Smaller details began to become apparent. He had dark rings under his eyes, illustrating that he hadn't slept well in quite some time. Though he had a broad, muscular build, she sensed he was self-conscious. There was a slight unease to the way he stared her down. His eyes were the most telling. They were dark and deep. They were laced with pain, so much pain. She was sure she had never seen another living soul baring the same amount of suffering.

Rey struggled to keep her face passive, but her surprise flickered across her face. He must have taken that as a sign of weakness, because he moved closer to her. She felt fear seize her. There was a slamming sound that echoed through the chamber, as he placed the helmet down. She kept her eyes on the wall straight ahead, as he moved into her line of vision, as if she could stare directly through him.

"Tell me about the droid."

 _Kriff_ , she thought, as she recalled BB-8 telling her his mission was classified. Well, he hadn't said what he wanted to know…

"He's a BB unit with a selenium drive and a thermal hyperscan vindicator."

He didn't seem to appreciate her sense of humor. His voice cut her off before she could finish. "It's carrying a section of a navigational chart. And we have the rest, recovered from the archives of the Empire, but we need the last piece. And somehow you convinced the droid to show it to you."

She remained silent. She would not — could not — betray BB-8 or the Resistance. Not for this monster. She'd rather die.

"You. A scavenger."

She hated the way he said the word. Scavenger. He may as well have called her bantha fodder. The underlying insult was the same. Foul beast of a man. He looked too clean, too well-kept to have ever known the struggles she had encountered almost daily. He sat here in his sterile ship, looking down on the rest of the universe with his clean clothes, full belly, and wanting for nothing. He had no right to talk down to her. She had faced far worse than him. Force or no force. He was just a coward in a mask. She had been correct in calling him a monster.

"You know I can take whatever I want."

Rey felt it then, the pressure of his invasion in her mind. Her breath came in spurts, as she willed herself to remain steady against his advance. She was acutely aware of his hand, raised near her face. The scent of leather filling her nostrils, as she felt her head screaming at the attack. The pressure started out similar to a headache coming on, as if she had toiled too long out in the Jakku sun. As he pushed further, the pain increased.

Part of her was aware he was speaking to her. The words fell away. She could barely see him anymore. Instead she was seeing flashes of her own life. She saw herself alone on Jakku, before she saved BB-8, before she met Finn at the outpost, and before she had flown the Millennium Falcon. The echo of her past played before her like a holo. Rey watched herself hoarding small objects she had found while scavenging. None of them were worth much, if anything. They were no good being traded. Still, she had so few personal belongings that these felt like treasures. She watched as she housed the collection in her abandoned AT-AT, organizing it in a particular fashion so she could keep her eye on the new items from her hammock bed.

Another vision — or memory — showed her in her young teens, being asked by a traveling missionary why she didn't leave. He offered her a spot on his ship, bound for Yavin 4. She politely declined before Unkar could over hear. She didn't need to feel his wrath or take another beating. She had too much work to do. Besides, if she left now, she may never see her family again. She needed to wait until they came back. They were coming for her. She had had the feeling as long as she could remember. Her family would find her. They would take her away from Jakku.

"And Han Solo…"

Her senses snapped together at the name. She saw Han, recalling how easy he was to talk to. Growing up, he was a legend, a myth of a man. His adventures, his ship, his success in the war had been comforting to her as a small child. He embodied all that she wished to be. He had come from nothing, turned out to be a hero. Meeting him, flying with him had made her feel worthy. It had given her a chance to forget her worthless past, her limited existence. The way he had looked at her, as if she was a bright star, made her feel loved, even if it was only for a second.

Kylo Ren's next words came out quick, as if he was working to hide something. Rey had spent enough time dodging other scavengers and ruffians to know when someone was attempting to conceal a secret. A flicker of an undefined emotion passed over his eyes. There was something there — something he did not want to admit, either to her or to himself.

"You feel like he's the father you never had. He would have disappointed you."

"Get out of my head," she managed to hiss back at him. She was pleasantly surprised when he did step back, his hand shifting along with the rest of him as he came to stand in front of her once more. He recovered quickly, once again asking for the map.

 _No_ , she thought, wanting to shake her head. She didn't. She gritted her teeth, preparing for another assault on her mind. Rey wondered how long he'd push against her. The invisible influence pried at the forefront of her mind. She took another deep breath, feeling sweat beading on her brow at the physical exertion to withstand it. For a second, her gaze jumped to the ceiling. There were no vents or openings in the panels that she could manipulate if she were to escape her shackles. The door was beginning to look like it was her only option. That would prove to be tricky.

As he continued to press against her, Rey became aware of another sensation. It wasn't a demanding pressure, the way his mental search was. The sensation was something entirely different. She compared it to a double-headed sand serpent, slithering between them, before it suddenly latched on at both ends - her and him. She jolted slightly at the shock of it, noticing how his head tilted ever so slightly at the same time.

"Don't be afraid. I feel it too."

His words scared her. What was it? What was happening to them? She wished she would have paid more attention to the travelers at the outputs who spun stories around the Force. Maybe if she had given it more thought, instead of casting it aside as superstition, she would understand. Clearly, she had misjudged the ancient power. The man in front of her has already illustrated what it can do. And the vision at Maz's castle still terrified her.

But she refused to yield.

"I'm not giving you anything." The last word came out roughly, but she felt him being held at bay. She didn't fall under the same spell as last time. This time she was conscious, able to focus on him and the room with absolute clarity. She had been in fights before, far more than she can count or remember. Others had often misjudged her due to her size, but she had learned to hold her own from a young age. This man, Force powers or not, would not beat her. She had been in combat against his type before.

"We'll see."

Rey wasn't sure if his retort was to her verbal refusal or her inner thoughts. It was hard to determine with the glare he was flashing at her.

She reached towards the serpentine thread connecting them. Her curiosity had gotten the better of her and while she was still resisting him, another part of her raced down the path that had been opened by the cord. It was a push-pull see-saw of energy for several moments. Time ticked by. Rey was barely aware of it. She found herself leaning forward, out of the chair. The harder he pressed her, the further she dove into the connection.

Then suddenly the pressure was gone.

"You…"

She was overcome by a strange, peaceful sensation, as if she had just come up to the surface after almost drowning. Light and fresh air. Before her stretched his mind, full of thoughts, conflicted emotions, and a growing fear. Her voice came out more assured when she spoke again.

"You're afraid…that you'll never be as strong as Darth Vader."

Rey released a breath she wasn't aware she was holding, watching as he gaped at her, unsure and unnerved. His breath came out in weak pants, much the same as hers did minutes prior. She had taken his weapon and used it against him. There was a rather satisfying feeling to that. Though she felt worn from her efforts, she was pleased.

Before she can say another word, he stalked out of the room, away from her. Left alone, her mind was swarming with questions. The main one repeating itself over and over again.

What was the connection that has them bond together?

* * *

Kylo was still seething upon realizing the girl had escaped. He blamed Hux. That self-absorbed man had failed him for the final time. He took his frustration out on the interrogation room, unsheathing his light saber and thrashing it about violently. He was aware of those who came near enough to hear his growls and curses. He was even more aware of their fear. It was a familiar sensation, flitting across his mind. It was a welcomed reprieve from what he had felt in the presence of the scavenger.

He felt foolish for not sensing the Force within her when he had found her planet-side. It hadn't been until she had pushed back against him that he had understood the depth of her abilities. She wasn't Force-sensative, the way his mother was. She was a Force-user. The instant she had displayed her raw skill, he had been caught off-guard. His shock quickly replaced by the idea he could mold her. She had potential. She could be of great use to the First Order.

As he had exited the chamber, he had began crafting a recommendation to take her on as his padawan. With training she could easily replace Hux and serve alongside him. It was an oddly satisfying idea. Not only would it remove Hux from the equation but he'd finally have someone who understood, someone who he could connect with. There were similarities between them. Those had not gone unnoticed by him. He was eager to use them to his advantage when he returned to convince her she had a place here on the base.

With him.

Now, noting her absence, he was more than eager to find her. He was desperate. His chance for a trainee had disappeared with her. He could sense her on the base, though her exact location was hard to pin point. She was on the move. As he stalked through the corridors leaving the tangled mess of metal parts in his wake, he felt another.

_Han Solo._

Kylo sneered. He did not have time for a reunion. At present he was more interested in finding the scavenger.

No, he thought, feeling how her emotions flared upon her reunion with the man he had once called father. The traitor was there along with Han Solo's loyal co-pilot, Chewbacca. Her feelings soared through the bond, triggering his own surge of emotion — pure rage. So she was working with them? They were going to help the rebels? Fine. He'd have to put a stop to that. Gathering a collection of Stormtroopers, he headed toward her. He would take back the girl and he'd be damned if he let Han Solo smuggle her out of the base.

He listened to the Force closely. She was moving again. She was no longer within the base. He needed to pick up the pace before he lost her to the carnage outside. He dismissed the Stormtroopers, leaving the task of locating the others to them. They had been trained for this. They could handle the matter. He would handle the scavenger. Storming towards the hangar, he intended to get his ship. It would make it easier to abduct her.

"Ben!"

_Kriff._

He did not want to do this now.

As if she had known, the doors above opened, revealing her along with the traitor. He kept his eyes focused on the man in front of him, ready to finish what the Supreme Leader had asked of him. When it was done, no one would stand in his way. The scavenger would be his.

Even as he fed his father false lines, he felt conflict rising from within. The tendrils of light that still shone dimly in his Force signature cried out, reaching towards the man who had once held him, once loved him. The dull light raged against the vibrant darkness surrounding his soul, pressing in two opposite directions, like a deflecting force-field. It churned inside of him, a deadly storm of turmoil he had been wrestling with for years. It was about to become more than he could control.

He dropped his helmet and removed his lightsaber from his belt. From his position, he could feel the girl's growing anxiety as she watched the scene unfold from her vantage point. She was worried for Han Solo and, in some small part, for him. He understood. She had seen inside his mind. She was not skilled enough to understand all of what she had uncovered, but she could sense the familiar clash he was fighting with now. She knew a turning point was coming.

His grandfather sent him a sign, darkening out the rays of light from the opening behind her. He ignited his saber, killing the last of the light within him. As he watched Han taken the blow, he heard her scream. It ripped at the bond, cutting into him, even as he watched his work take the life of the man in front of him. The pain he should have felt from murdering his father in cold blood was overshadowed by the hollowness and overwhelming loss the girl was experiencing.

Kylo took in his breaths slowly, working to focus beyond her increase of sentiment. It was due to her reaction he wasn't able to anticipate Chewbacca's attack. He took the plasma shot to his left side. The force of the hit sent him down on one knee, nearly placing him off balance to fall over the same ledge Han had. The troopers began firing, met with opposition from the girl and the traitor on above. Then the entire room erupted into explosions.

His father had always preferred large disruptions. Kylo should have known he would use bombs. Despite his physical injury and his head swimming with the scavenger's feelings, he raised up to find her. She was working with the traitor to blast their way out. He locked eyes with her, nearly letting out an anguished cry when he saw her lead FN-2187 out the door.

Kylo wouldn't permit her to leave. FN-2187 may have abandoned the First Order, but the scavenger would not. She belonged with him. Blood boiling, he turned on his heel, ignoring the commotion going on around him as the base fell apart. He headed to a utility shaft, following the tunnel out to the forest. Her Force signature was easier to recognize now. Their bond was growing. He could sense her, even as she fled further and further into the snow.

 _You can run, but you can't hide,_  he thought with a smirk.  _Not from me._

He would make sure they were together.

* * *

_Scavenger._

A voice called out. Rey ignored it, keeping her breathing steady as she began to draw the Force into herself, as Master Luke had taught her. Light. Darkness. The balance. She began to see it all coming into focus.

I can sense you. The voice taunted.

It sounded eerily familiar. Perhaps she had heard it in a dream.

_Scavenger._

Rey paid no attention to the nagging voice. Luke had warned her that the Dark side would try to seduce her. She was not going to fall. She would not fail her master. The time she had spent on Ahch-To was time away from Finn, her best friend, who was still recovering from his life-threatening wounds. He had taken those for her. He had been trying to save her. She wanted to become a skilled Jedi to ensure no one ever took such a risk for her again. She needed to be stronger, more equipped. When she was, she would return to the Resistance and fight with them — fight alongside of him. Because Finn had to make it. He had to live.

Somehow, against all odds, thoughts of him had given her the strength to press on. It had given her the drive she needed, the spark to reach for the lightsaber. The moment it had ignited in her hands she had felt the power coursing through her. It had terrified her then just as it had the first time she had come into contact with the weapon. She would have rather fought Kylo Ren with her staff.

_Rey._

Her memories halted at the sound of her name. And she knew.

She knew who was calling her.

A ghost.

Rey, he said again. She clutched at the earth in front of her, fearing what it meant that he could reach her.

_Stop toying with me, she responded. You're dead._

_Is that what your master told you?_ He sounded amused.

_Get out of my head._

_Make me._

_Childish, arrogant, intolerable, conceited-_

_Temper, temper. That's not the Jedi way, he chided._

Rey all but growled in frustration.  _Go haunt someone else_ , she snapped, slamming down her mental walls.

She trained with Luke day in and day out for the rest of the week. All the while, she made every effort to keep the barrier up. She considered asking her master about Force ghosts, but her nerves got the best of her. She was concerned about what Master Luke would say if he discovered the bond she had with Kylo Ren. She was certain her mentor would label it as a temptation of the Dark side and stop training her. So she remained silent, guarded.

At the end of the week, Luke had her meditating along the coast. He had her clear her mind, center herself, and search through the Force. Slowly aspects of the universe came into focus. Light. Darkness. The balance. She recognized certain places, certain people in her mind's eye. She could sense her master next to her. He was pleased. She felt herself begin to smile. And then her search went into a tail-spin.

Her vision was pulled back. She felt disoriented and slightly dizzy. There was no reason she should understand what happened, but somehow she was aware she was in the past. The memory she was thrust into was not hers. It came to her in shocking flashes, the way her visions had come to her when she first touched the Skywalker lightsaber on Takodana.

There was a boy, maybe about four or so, clutching the hand of his mother as she deposited him on a different world. She was talking over him to Luke. Rey recognized her voice before she recognized her face. General Leia Organa had aged greatly since the time of the memory. The scene tilted and the same boy appeared again. This time he was older. He was sitting in a meadow, meditating. His ears and nose were too big for his face, made all the more prominent by the short hair cut he's been given. It's puberty at it's cruelest, but the next scene is crueler. A collection of other students passed him, whispering harsh criticism about his features, one going as far as to kick him. He never moved, not even a twitch of his fingers on his knees. Next, she saw a building burning, destroyed from the inside out. The Knights of Ren were assembled off to the side, watching the structure fall. At the center of their huddle is a masked Kylo Ren, features now hidden from the world.

A hand on her back pulled her free of the history. She gasped, her lungs burning with the lack of oxygen. It took her a moment to gather her senses and come back into herself. Her surroundings came into focus. She was back on the island. She wasn't alone. There was something coming, something unsaid that she knew to dread before she took it in.

Rey saw it then. The fear. Luke's eyes were full of it. He told her that he couldn't train her, that he was too old and too lost to train any new Jedi. She could barely contain her emotions long enough to move away from him. She felt everything and nothing all at once. The Force thrummed through her and in her haste to put distance between her once master and herself, she released the block she built up to keep the ghost from her past at bay.

As if he had been waiting, his voice reached out to her.

_Skywalker is a hack._

_Kriff-off._

_Your mouth is rather foul for someone training to be a Jedi._

_Go to hell, Kylo._

_Your temper needs to be controlled._

_You would know._

_Is that a compliment?_

She let out a scream of utter exasperation. Her fight or flight response kicked in. She ran. The island was made up of rolling hills, cliffs, and slopes. Rey paid no attention to the varying heights or surfaces, as her legs carried her across the earth. She pushed her body, urged herself on. Down the stairs she had climbed up on her first day, across the length of the western shore, up the south slopes. She ran and climbed and even swam at one point. She compressed her emotions, squashed them through the vicious workout she conducted. The sun began to set from the sky, coating the island and its surroundings in an inky black sky, dotted with stars.

When she hit the western shore again, she collapsed to her knees, sinking into the sand. The suppressed disappointment surfaced. It crashed into her the way the waves to her side crashed into the shoreline.

_My offer still stands._

_What?_

Her thought barely registers before he responded. _You need a teacher. I can help you._

_You couldn't even help yourself._

_I'm not dead._

_Yes you a-._

_Search your feelings, Rey._

Against her better judgement, she listened to him. She had not reached out to their bond in months. She struggled at first, to latch onto it, but found it waiting for her. When she dove in, the connection opened easily for her. Rey saw him clearly, as if he was directly in front of her. He was sitting on a First Order base, she assumed due to the decor. It looked eerily similar to the Starkiller base. The helmet was displaced, hanging off his hand, as he stared at it. He sensed her watching and set it down next to his bed.

The room was rather bare, void of any personal belongings or individual touches to mark it his. If his helmet wasn't sitting there, he could be in any barrack. She was not sure what she thought she'd see. He wasn't the type to have holos of his friends and family or any heirlooms. As she thought it, she realized how silly the assumption is. This was a man who murdered his father in front of her and would do the same to her, if given the chance again.

_I do not wish to kill you._

_Don't lie to me._

_I never have. And I have never wanted to kill you. You have too much potential. It would be a waste._

_Force pushing me into a tree is alright though?_

_You survived._

_Thanks to Finn._

Rey felt his anger ignite through the bond at the mention of her friend. There was a tense silence as the heat simmered. She held her ground, waiting. The memory of that night, lying in the snow after her back hit the tree was so different than this moment. There was no chill in the air, no smell of hot metal or taste of blood. Her cheeks aren't stained with tears for Han Solo. Her friend isn't by her side. Immediately, she felt guilt over leaving him at the base, leaving him to heal on his own without her to watch over him as he had done for her.

_FN-2187 does not deserve your care._

_Jealous?_

He didn't respond to that, but there was another intense flare up stemming from his unchecked emotions. She had hit a nerve. Unconcerned with his wrath, she pushed further.

_I suppose monsters don't understand caring._

_Perhaps not, but at least I didn't abandon you,_ he growled, playing on her insecurity. _Can FN-2187 say the same?_

She paused, swallowing an uneasy lump that has rose into her throat at his words. Finn did run off leaving her alone on Takodana. Even after she asked him to stay, he had left…just like everyone else in her life. His departure had stung more than the others, possibly because he had been the closest thing to a friend she had ever had. But he had come back, he had come for her to save her. She had to remind herself not to get too caught up in her past emotions. It was just that. Past. It had no purpose now. Finn had chosen her. He had chosen to risk his life to find her.

He came after me, she insisted. After you stole me away! Rey felt her annoyance surge, pushing the words harder than intended across the galaxy to wherever he was. She watched him lose balance for a split second, before righting himself.

_Your powers are growing._

It wasn't a snide remark. It wasn't even a question. If anything, it almost sounded as if he was impressed. She didn't know how to handle that. She was still fuming over how his actions took away her chance to work with Han, removed her ability to go home without being dragged further into the rebellion, the Jedi…all of this.

 _If you come after me again, I'll give you more than a scar,_ she snapped, still aggravated.

 _Doubtful,_ he mused. _The next time we meet, Scavenger, it will be you who comes after me._

And she did.

It was weeks later. Luke remained resolute in his refusal to train her, leaving her to her own devices. She tried in vain to change his mind, even attempted to use her powers of compulsion over him, but he was well trained, more so than she was, and she failed. As the end of the month approached, he still refused, telling her to return with Chewie to the Resistance, back where she belonged.

When she gave in, she expected Kylo Ren to be condescending. Waiting for an 'I-told-you-so'-esq quip to come, she was floored when he told her he was on his way. So he has known? He had known the entire time that she was on Anch-To. He had never once attacked, never let the First Order come to collect Luke or blow the island from the sky. She was not sure what to make of that, so she didn't linger on the thought. Instead she waited by the shore, meditating.

Hours passed by. She hardly noticed until the sound of a TIE fighter landing broke her out of her trance. Her eyes focused on the black on black ship, as it landed further down the beach. She was sure Luke had sensed his nephew. She wondered if Chewbacca would be coming after them. He still had his own grudge to air with the Knight of Ren. Gathering up her staff and bag, she moved towards the newly arrived member on the island. The ramp came down, as Kylo Ren, dressed in his typical black garbs, stomped down.

She wasn't surprised he came alone, though she did wonder how he was able to get away without an escort. Paired with the fact he had never attacked the island, she began to doubt his loyalty to the First Order. During their previous encounter, he had wanted the map to Skywalker. Was there a reason he no longer required his uncle?

"Rey!"

A familiar voice caused her steps to falter. She had turned around to see Luke staring down at her. His eyes held more emotion in them at that moment then the entire time she had been on the island. She shook her head, done with waiting for him. She had made her choice.

"Rey!" He cried out again. She noticed Kylo stalking forward from his ship. He must have been concerned she would back out on their agreement. He doesn't know that she has never been one to go back on her word.

"This is not going to go the way you think!" Her ex-master shouted, as if his words would break her out of some spell.

Then Kylo was by her side, reaching out his hand. She felt a pull from behind her. It was Luke's last attempt to keep her. It was no match for the swelling of her Force bond with the man before her. The familiar sensation of being in physical proximity to him had the connection humming wildly about them. She gave him her hand.

If he was smiling, she couldn't see it. His mask was covering his face, keeping his expressions hidden. A sense of smugness did come through the bond. As she passed him, he dropped her hand, placing his on her lower back as he guided her down to the waiting ship. She bite the inside of her mouth to keep from flinching under the touch. Rey was sure it was meant for Luke's benefit far more than it is for hers.

As they board, he moved away to close the airlock, before he strolled past her to the cockpit. He didn't say anything when she took the seat next to him.

Her ears were ringing and her heart was beating erratically. She was beginning to doubt her choice. She couldn't trust Kylo Ren. Force bonded or not, he wasn't someone she could rely on. Where else was she to go? Back to the Resistance? Back to Jakku? Back to Luke?

This wasn't her fight. It wasn't what she had asked for. She had only wanted to find her family. Maz's words echoed in her head. _Whomever you are waiting for on Jakku, they're never coming back._ Even now, months later, the memory stung at the corners of her eyes. She absently brushed the back of her hand against her face, scrubbing away the foolish tears.

She barely registered the take off. It wasn't until they made the jump to light speed and she was propelled back into her seat that she realized what was done was done. There was no turning back now.

A clicking noise had her glancing over to see Kylo removed his helmet.

"I knew you would make the correct choice," he stated, evenly.

Rey worried on her bottom lip. If he had read her mind to decipher the root of her uncertainty, she didn't feel it. More than likely her face had given her away.

"You changed your hair."

His observation was not something she expected to hear. In fact, she was shocked he had noticed. His attempt at small talk was almost enough to make her laugh. She found herself, exhaling, releasing a bit of the nervous pressure building up in her chest.

"Same outfit?" She gestured to his monotone assortment of clothing.

"No, new cowl."

It was ridiculous. The pathetic attempt at conversation, but she couldn't help it. She laughed. The sound broke up the tension in her body and in the air surrounding them. He provided her a fleeting grin, hardly noticeable but she caught it before it disappeared under his normal scowl.

"How long?" She asked, the laughter dying away at the seriousness of what she had chosen once again weighing on her.

"Six standard hours," he commented, off-handedly. Then, as if rethinking something he added, "You should rest. There is a chamber in the back."

Rey wasn't tired, but he was right. Rising up from her seat, she started for the rear of the ship, then paused. She didn't know what to expect when she arrived. She was sure she will not be offered any small kindnesses. Running from the First Order and assisting in the destruction of the Starkiller base was sure to have earned her enemies. If they were anything like Kylo Ren, she could be dead before breakfast, or more likely, tortured until she was wishing she was dead.

"You will be with me at all times," he said, suddenly. She turned her head to meet his eyes over her shoulder. "No one will raise a hand to you. If they try, they will answer to me."

He returned his gaze forward. His reassurances were meant to pacify her, but the possessiveness in his voice was what she latched onto. It wasn't the type of feeling she expected him to exhibit. His temper tantrums were rather childlike. Despite that, she had never seen him be attached to any particular thing, place, or person. She understood his goal in all of this. He wanted her to train. He wanted to mold her to be like him. Her potential, as he called it, had attracted him to her since their first meeting. He saw her as some sort of pet.

"No, as an ally," he insisted, not looking up from the controls.

"Ally?"

"You are my equal," he sighed. His voice was so quiet, as if the words are difficult to speak out loud.

Rey took it as her cue to leave, walking back until she found the single bed chamber he spoke of. With no change of clothes, she simply slipped off her boots and socks, before lying down on the stiff bed. As she closed her eyes, she contemplated the final word. Equal. No one had ever called her that.

The fact that he had been the one to say it shouldn't warm her as much as it had. She attempted to push the conversation from her mind. The chamber must have be above the engine. Most would have considered the racket annoying. Rey found it familiar and calming. The machine's constant noise started to lull her to sleep. As she drifted off, she heard one word: Equal.

In her dreams, she saw them come together, separate from how they were with the bond. Equal. Together.


	2. Part II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You're inside my mind. Got me so confused. Don't know wrong from right. The thrill of this pain still drives me insane, but I can't escape. I know it's too late." - Rebekah White

Snoke was torturing her. He conducted it in front of him, purposefully. Her cries of pain are what broke him. He could feel her shattering through their bond. It was what finally sent him over the edge. He had been resolute in his attempt to deny any lingering feelings, any remnants of the Light within in. Kylo had promised his grandfather he would finish what he started. Upon seeing Rey's contorted features, a new thought occurred. What would his grandmother think?

Padme Amidala would not stand for this.

Neither would he.

Igniting his lightsaber, he swung it in a high arch, attempting to decapitate his master. Snoke had sensed his intentions, easily deflecting the blow. However, the energy required to defend against Kylo's attack had weakened his hold on Rey, who fell to the floor. Her body crumbled into a heap, as she lie gasping for breath. Not to be deterred, Kylo rose to strike again. Once again, Snoke avoided the blow. Kylo worked to center himself. He needed to calm his raging emotions, find control.

He thought of Rey.

They had been training for nearly a month together. He knew her strokes, her stances, and her fighting personality. When he had given her instruction, she had followed, hardly ever requiring a second reminder or reprimand for any flaws. She was beyond gifted, having natural skill and learned behaviors from a lifetime of self-defense living on that barren planet Jakku. He had had to remind himself multiple times to stop starring.

The time spent together had earned him more of her trust. Though her table manners were far from decent, he didn't fault her. She had not been granted the privileged upbringing he had. He could not blame her for her ignorance. At least she knew how to use the utensils he had had set out for them at each meal. Rey had opened up over dinner some evenings. She had told him about how she had managed to survive, the trinkets she had collected and kept for herself, and why she dreamed so often of the ocean and the island.

Topics centering around what had transpired on the Starkiller base were never brought up. It was an unspoken truce between them. Neither wanted to be the first to bring it up. Kylo appreciated her ability to disregard the past. Once before he had found her hope naive, believing it made her weak. Having it used on him, permitting him to know her better, made him rethink his earlier assessment — at least as it pertained to him.

His favorite topic was when she spoke of flying. The way her face lit up as she described the high she felt. Her eyes would go wide, her smile would grow to the point where he thought it would take over her face. Her cheeks must have been sore with all her talking and smiling. He found himself grinning at times. Her joy was contagious.

He focused on one particular memory of an evening when she had told him about how she had flown the Millennium Falcon. It had been the first time she had gone off planet and it had been disastrous. As she regaled him with how she managed the controls, nervous, but determined, he had seen her. She had let her guard down, completely opened to him. And in that instant he decided he'd wait. He wouldn't use his powers to sneak into her mind, to open her up. He'd have patience and faith she would do so on her own and let him in.

It was that thought he clung to.

Kylo struck again, this time making contact with Snoke's arm, effectively cutting off one of his hands. The Supreme Leader reached over with his other hand, sending Kylo flying backwards into the nearest wall. The moment he hit, his eyes flew open to see Rey on her feet. She looked slightly unsteady, however her grip was firm. She held her lightsaber with intent, charging at Snoke. She brought it down quickly, slashing into his side. He sent her flying as well. Kylo watched as she hit the opposite wall, the lightsaber falling away from her grasp.

The guards entered then, swarming to protect their master. It was a flood of red. Kylo straightened up, hand wrapping around the hilt of his lightsaber. Across the room, Rey summoned her weapon back to her. She locked eyes with him.

_This is what we've been training for, he sent her the message across their bond. Ready?_

_Yes._

Simultaneously they sprung into action, both attacking from opposite ends. The guards were not anticipating a coordinated attack. He used their lack of preparation to his advantage, easily cutting down those who stood in his way. Brute strength and brunt force were his methods. Rey moved lightly, as if dancing through the First Order cronies who advanced on her. He caught a glimpse of her flipping over one, as she struck another down. She was the most gorgeous thing he had ever beheld. A true fighter.

It didn't take long for him to get to Snoke. The old creature, hunched over his dismembered limb. Kylo glared with pure hatred down at the master who had used him. His father had been right. Lashing out desperately, the Supreme Leader, managed to sink a piece of metal into his upper thigh. Kylo hissed at the rush of pain, before drawing out the shared roughly. He tossed it aside, noticing how the droplets of blood scattered across the black floor. His rage burned like an inferno. Snoke saw what he meant to do. He tried to reason with him.

"I made you. You can't end me. I-."

With one stroke, he succeeded in his original intent — slicing Snoke's head clean off. His former master fell. More guards entered the room. Their leader was dead. Their mission was not. He turned his attention to the oncoming attacks, knowing Rey could handle herself and trusting she would be safe. Even still, he kept tabs on her via their bond.

"Kylo!" In his haste to finish Snoke and the battle, he hadn't seen the hidden guard advancing. He knew he would take the hit. As he accepted it, Rey injected herself between them, taking the full blow to her side.

"No!"

His wrath crashed out of him, causing the guard to stumble back. He sliced the man in half, before kneeling next to her. Crimson seeped out of her. No, he thought again, but his words came out differently.

"Can you stand?"

"Yes," she huffed, one hand keeping pressure on the wound, while the other clung to her weapon.

He kept his hands on her, righting her as she rose. "We need to leave," he told her, his eyes fixated on the blood soaking through her robes. "Can you walk?" He began to reach for her. She slapped his hand away.

"I'm fine."

She didn't look it. Her face was already becoming pale. He shook his head, not wanting to waste time. He could see to it she was attended to once they were safe, far away from here and the First Order. He led her out of the chamber, towards the fleet hangar. With all the commotion they had caused, it would be relatively simple to steal a vessel and make the jump to lightspeed. None would be the wiser.

They rounded a corner. As they neared the hangar, a different kind of commotion caught his attention. There was a battle raging on above them. The Resistance. He willed himself not to roll his eyes. This would complicate matters.

"Rey!"

 _Of course_ , he groaned inwardly. _Of course the Resistance would send FN-2187_. He watched as the ex-Stormtrooper ran up the length of the corridor, a short woman in tow. He was so consumed by his jealousy at the sight of the other man, he didn't notice how the blood loss had affected Rey. When her legs gave out, he felt the bond weaken. Instinctively, he wrapped an arm around her torso, drawing her against his chest, so he could support her full weight and still maintain hold on his lightsaber. He knew she wouldn't appreciate him attacking her friend, but he was prepared to do what was necessary to keep her from further harm.

"Rey!" FN-2817 looked livid as he stopped in front of Kylo. "What did you do?"

"I saved her," he snarled.

"Give her to me."

"I've got her." _She's mine_ , he thought, possessively. He would not be handing her over to anyone — Resistance, First Order, his uncle or otherwise.

The other man seemed to consider something for a moment, before his companion spoke up. "We've got to get out of here before this places blows." She tugged on his arm.

"Come on," he said to Kylo, grudgingly. His gaze flickered to Rey's motionless form, noting the blood pooling from the wound on her side. "We have med packs on the ship."

Kylo disarmed his saber, before scooping Rey up in his arms. _Stay with me_ , he thought, as he looked down upon her face, so pale now. Every thing had changed since their first meeting. She had no choice this time, not because he had knocked her out, but because she had chosen to take a hit meant for him. She had knowingly put herself between him and the strike. She had chosen to come here, to train with him. She had chosen to be by his side. He was meant to protect her. Hadn't he told her as much? He had failed again. Failed to keep her safe. Failed to show her they were equals. Failed to tell her his feelings ran deeper than an admiration of her powers and her brilliant mind. Failed. Failed. Failed.

_Stay with me._

He repeated it again and again and again, his silent plea to let her live. His only wish was for them to stay together.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The room came into focus slowly. Rey found herself lying in a medical bay bed, surrounded by numerous beeping machines. There were no droids currently in the room, but her wound had been dressed with a bacta patch. She heard heavy breathing to her left. Finn. She felt relief at the sight of him, sleeping in a chair next to her bed. He had his head propped up on one hand, as if he had been trying to stay awake before exhaustion won out. She smiled, looking him over. He was healed. He had come for her. Again.

"Oh good, you're awake," a woman's voice had her turning towards the doorway. She was shorter than Rey, dressed in Resistance garbs, like Finn. She came in with a ration bar in her hand, extending it to Rey. "I'm Rose. Rose Tico."

"Rey."

"I know," she laughed. "Finn hasn't shut up about you since I met him."

It was Rey's turn to laugh. "He is talkative."

"Yeah," Rose agreed, her eyes settling on the man of their discussion. Rey watched how the other woman starred at him. There was definitely an attraction there. She wondered if her friend knew. From what she had gathered from him in passing, he could sometimes miss what others found evident.

"They dressed your wound about an hour ago," Rose informed her. "The patch should hold until we reach the base. Then the real medics will get to work."

"It's fine," Rey assured her.

"Didn't look fine when you collapsed."

Rey couldn't recall much from earlier. The details were still hazy.

"We found you in the hallway, bleeding out. The First Order base was about to cave in on itself, so we brought you on board. Our pilot, Poe Dameron, is the best in the Resistance. He'll have us on base in no time. I'm sure everyone will be glad to see you safely returned," Rose brought her up to speed. "I've never met a Jedi before."

"I'm not a Jedi," Rey corrected her. "I was training when I-." How did she explain leaving the famous Luke Skywalker to train with the First Order enforcer, Kylo Ren? She didn't know this woman. If if wasn't for Finn's presence in the room, she wouldn't have been sure she was even on a Resistance ship. This could all be a falsehood propagated by the First Order to make her talk. And talking about her decision to leave Ahch-To was not something she wanted to do in her current state, least of all to this unknown woman, no matter how kind she seemed to be on the surface.

"He obviously cares about you a great deal," Rose changed the subject.

Rey nodded. "Yes, he was my first real friend," she replied, her eyes falling on Finn's face.

"Wait, you're talking about Finn?" The way Rose's question hung in the air, caused Rey to rotate towards her. The small woman's eyes weren't on their mutual friend. They were focused behind Rey, a detail she hadn't caught on to until then.

She glanced over to her opposite side, her breath hitching in her throat at the sight of him. Kylo Ren, First Order member and brooding ex-Sith Lord, hunched over into the edge of her bed, sound asleep. Rey could hardly believe the sight. His position looked terribly uncomfortable. He had been at one point sitting in a chair, the same kind Finn was in, but had since slumped forward, falling onto the mattress. His one arm hung off the side, dangling to the floor, while the other served as a makeshift pillow for his head. His raven locks obscured most of his face, but from the heavy heaves of his breathing, she knew he was asleep.

Rey carefully reached over, to tuck his hair back, away from his pale face.

"He hasn't left your side once," Rose confided. "He blames himself for what happened."

Rey nodded, once again. It was the only response she could give the other woman. Her throat had constricted so tight, she couldn't put words to her emotions, even if she knew how. There was a rollercoaster of feelings rushing through her both from Rose's observations and the one she currently was taking of the man aside of her.

She ran her fingers through his hair, enjoying how smooth and soft the tresses were against her skin. It was such a contrast t his normal mood — his sharp tone, pointed features. He had an air of peacefulness about him in that moment. His face wasn't pulled into a grimace or scowl, like usual. In this light, without his normal demeanor, he looked so much younger, so much lighter.

The darkness that had consumed him, was Snoke, masquerading as Anakin Skywalker and manipulating the young, lost Ben Solo for his own personal gain. Rey had seen first hand the cruelty that wicked creature could unleash. When he had begun torturing her to force Kylo's hand, she had not only felt her pain, but his. It was difficult to breath, having felt their conjoined suffering through the bond. But his fear had been paralyzing. In that moment, Kylo had feared more than ever before. He had feared for her life. It had given him the strength to over power his master and shatter the hold he had held over Rey.

She found herself gingerly touching the bandage around her mid-section at the memory. Though the bacta patches were helping, she was fairly certain there would be a scar.

"What will you do when we get back to the base?" Rose asked.

Rey had not considered her next steps. Frankly, she was lucky to be alive and headed back to a place where people wouldn't be actively trying to kill her. As soon as she realized that, she understood the irony in it. She was safe, but the same could not be said for Kylo Ren. He was an enemy of the Resistance and now, thanks to her, the First Order as well. There was no where safe for him.

So why had he come with them? Surely once Finn had found her, he could have passed her off to her friend, knowing she would be taken care of. It would be in his best interest to vanish completely.

"Can't get rid of me that easily."

He must have heard her thoughts through the bond, because in the next moment he was sliding off the bed to sit up on his chair.

"I'll leave you two to talk," Rose excused herself, but not before shaking Finn awake and dragging him out with her.

The med bay door shifting close was the only sound for an entire minute. Rey heard every second tick by as she lingered in baited breath to hear his explanation.

Rey thought of how their time had been spent before her audience with Snoke. The three weeks they had spent training one on one had been instructional and even fun. Kylo had set them up in an abandoned hangar. The space was large, providing them enough room to effectively practice any and all techniques he chose to approach. He was insanely detailed and strategic in all of his attacks. She had had to work double time to keep up with him. At the close of each session, her muscles burned from the constant movement, but she felt renewed. The dismay she had felt as Luke's rejection had faded, replaced by newfound admiration for Kylo's expertise and his willingness to share it with her.

When they completed training for the day, they would meditate, a process Rey continued to struggle with. Her life as a Scavenger had taught her to constantly be aware and on the move. It was not wise to linger longer than needed in one particular place. Predators of all life-forms could be lurking nearby, waiting for her defenses to lower so they could attack. Meditation felt like that, like she was leaving an opening for a waiting advance, especially after a round of rigorous physical activity.

"Your body is prepared. Your mind needs to be as well," Kylo had informed her. "Not all attacks are physical." He didn't talk down to her or chose her the way Master Luke had. He had understood her struggle with the concept. And he had been right.

During their next session, when she had foolishly thought she had gotten the upper hand on him, he had shifted his focus to her mind. She had been ready to strike from above, when he pushed in so sharply she had lost her balance. She would have gone careening off the stack of the crates into the floor, if he hadn't been there to catch her.

When his arms had been around her, she felt a strange sense of deja vu, as if he had held her before. A feeling of longing had swept through her, causing her to freeze in his grasp. His eyes had locked onto hers. The intensity she saw in his eyes had altered from purposeful to a carnal need. Time fell away as they stared at one another. She could hear her pulse fluttering about wildly. The bond hummed along with it, creating a type of music she found she enjoyed listening to.

"That's why you need meditation." He told her, a second later, as he set her upright. "Again."

Their stalled moment went undiscussed. Training continued on in the usual manner for the remainder of their time. Each evening, when they were both worn down, they would retire to his quarters, taking turns in the refresher before all but falling into their own beds. Rey had never been as drained as she felt on those nights. Sleep came blissfully easy.

They took their meals in the hangar, never detouring from either his chamber or their sparing place. Rey had considered asking about it once, but decided against it. Kylo's promise of protection repeated in her mind.

_No one will raise a hand to you. If they try, they'll answer to me._

At the time, she thought he was telling her so she'd remain calm and confident in her decision. As they spent more time together, she began to contemplate if he had also said the words as a vow to himself. In the beginning, she had been too occupied with learning and soaking up any and all new knowledge he shared with her to take notice. As the days turned into weeks, she picked up on how his eyes shifted ever so slightly away from her and to the doors.

The flicker of attention occurred often. It was as if he was waiting for something. It didn't appear to be something he wanted. Still, the moment General Hux stormed in, interrupting their training, Rey had been unprepared for what was about to occur.

She could feel the bond bristle. Kylo was more aware of what was to come than she had been. She clung to his promise, nearly reaching out for his hand when she was confronted by the face of the demon whose name she had heard whispered in the corridors.

"How are you feeling?" Kylo's voice propelled her back to the present.

"Like I took a plasma bolt to my side," she replied, lifting up the bacta patch slightly to see the slash on her side. Her lips drew up into a small grin. "You were right. We are equal. Guess I had to get the matching scar to prove it," she teased.

His face looked anything but amused. As his eyes trailed her scorched skin, he clenched his jaw. She noted his hands were balled up into fists at his side, shaking slightly. "I failed to keep my promise."

"Kylo-."

"He was never going to let you live," he snapped, silencing her. "I should have been able to see it. I should have known he'd use you to get to me. It was obvious."

"Why would he use me to persuade you?" His body stiffened at her question. He didn't respond.

Rey leaned forward, wincing at the rush of pain from her still healing wound. She reached out for his fist, wrapping her hand over his. "Kylo?"

He couldn't meet her gaze.

There was a hiss as the medbay doors opened. "We are coming into orbit at Hoth," Finn announced, strolling in, unaware.

Kylo slunk back, out from under her touch instantly. Rey scooted to lean back against the bed headboard. Finn's eyes danced between them briefly, but he didn't ask.

"The General wants a word when we arrive," he continued. "I should warn you both, word got out that-."

"The First Order puppet is on board," Kylo finished for him. "And what time should I be expecting my execution?" Rey's head snapped to the side to stare at him. They couldn't possibly kill him after he had saved her life. Could they? "That is their intention," he answered her thoughts, finally looking at her.

"What?" Finn had a confused expression on his face.

Before Rey could explain, Poe entered the room. She held back an eye roll. Was everyone going to visit while she tried to pry the reasoning out of Kylo? "You're awake," he let out relieved half sigh, half laugh. "Glad to have you onboard, Madame Jedi." Now she did roll her eyes.

"Poe Dameron, nice to see you."

"And you," he mock bowed at her, before his signature smile fell away at the sight of Kylo. "Ren."

"Dameron."

"You two know each other?" She was surprised.

"Torture."

"Childhood."

"Ah, is that what they call it?" Kylo questioned, darkly.

Rey raised an eyebrow. "Wait, you grew up together?"

"The Organa's and Dameron's have been friends for generations," Poe explained, crossing his arms over his chest as he scrutinized Kylo. "I'm anxious to see what Leia does to you."

"Only what I deserve."

Poe's eyes filled with fire. His arms dropped, as one hand shot out to point an angry finger at Kylo. "What you deserve is a kriffing-."

"Enough!" Rey shouted, throwing her hands up to stop them both. Poe froze, but the grimace on his face returned, as did his crossed-arm position. "You two are acting like children."

"He started it," mumbled Kylo, in his signature whiny way. _Must be a Skywalker trait_ , Rey found herself thinking. Both Luke and Leia had let slip a few less than mature grousing moments. She had a feeling it was a family trait. Kylo tended to be rather sensitive at times.

"Out," she snapped at Finn and Poe.

"But we're about to land," Finn protested.

"When we land, you can come back. Until then, I need to speak to Kylo." Neither man moved. "Alone."

Roughly a minute ticked by before her overprotective friends headed her request. It wasn't lost on her the way their gazes traveled from her to Kylo and back again. If they hadn't been suspicious before, they were now. She let them go. They could think what they wanted. All she cared for was answers.

"Kylo, about Snoke-."

Her words caught in her throat. There was blood running down Kylo's leg onto the sterile white floor. She hadn't noticed the wound when he had been sleeping because of his slumped position. Now, the crimson color was an uncanny reminder that they had both been dealt blows during the battle. However, she had been the only one who had been treated.

"Why didn't you say anything you laser brain?" He stared at her, astonished upon hearing her insult. He started to retort, but she cut him off. "You are going to have the med bay patch you up when we get to the base, do you hear me?"  
"They won't patch up a dead man."

Rey disregarded her body's discomfort. "I won't let them. You aren't alone," she told him, taking his hand. "We're in this together."

He gave her hand a slight squeeze, but didn't speak. He didn't have to.

They sat in comfortable silence, her hand lost within his larger one. They didn't break apart again when the doors opened for Finn and Poe. "We're approaching the landing strip," Finn explained, while Poe glared at his childhood companion. "We should cuff him."

"No," Rey shook her head. "He isn't a prisoner. He came willingly."

"Rey, he's from the First Order."

"So were you. Or have you forgotten you only defected last year?" She could see how her words got under his skin, but she didn't care. "I trusted you, Finn. I gave you a chance. Can you please do the same for me?"

"It's not the same," he stressed.

Rey shook her head, dropping the argument. She would not waste time fighting with her best friend. She needed to get Kylo medical attention, since he was reluctant to get it for himself. A droid entered, behind her friends, coming to release her from the various machines and hook-ups that had been monitoring her vitals. With a quick thank you, she proceeded to slip off the bed, on Kylo's side.

"Can you walk?"

"I recall asking you the same thing earlier today," he teased.

"And I lied."

"Not very Lightsider of you."

"So I've been told. You also told me you've never lied to me."

"True. And I never will."

"So, can you walk?"

"No."

He murmured it so softly, she barely heard. As she moved to help him, Poe appeared behind him, blaster drawn. "That isn't necessary," Rey snapped, annoyed at everyone in her vicinity. Kylo for being stubborn, Finn for being a walking contradiction, and now Poe for not trusting her judgement regarding the man who saved her life. Each of them stilled at the sharp tone of her voice, affected by it in their own right.

"It's a precaution," Poe stated, his voice level. "If he doesn't give me a reason to use it, I won't."

Rey grumbled a few curses under her breath, giving Kylo a rough shrug to get a better grip around his upper torso with her arms. If her shoving her small frame under him to help support him while they debarked bothered him, he didn't mention it. In fact, he was keeping his side of the bond tightly closed. She couldn't even gauge his comfort level.

The ramp lowered. As expected, there was a growing crowd of Resistance members waiting for them. The crowd was split down two sides, causing Rey's eyes to instantly fall upon General Organa and her twin. Rey felt relief wash over her. Despite the terms under which she had left Ahch-To, she was pleased to see her ex-Master. Glancing up and over at Kylo, she came to the conclusion that she was the only one.

Her Force-bonded partner stared hard at only living relatives, as if he could scare them away purely by scowling. Rey tried to reach out to him, but the connection was still closed. Stubborn ass, she thought, as she continued to help drag his weight forward into the base. Finn and Rose took the lead, followed by the rest of the crew who had been aboard their ship. Poe brought up the rear, keeping the blaster positioned just out of sight to not draw any additional attention or alarm to the black-clad man she had next to her.

He might as well have. The clapping and cheering which had erupted upon their descent began to fade, as one by one the crowd became aware of Kylo Ren's presence. Rey felt the mood shift through the Force. Even without her powers she knew what was coming.

A plasma bolt came flying towards them. Reflexively, her hand shot out, freezing the fire before it could make contact. Kylos eyebrows raised slightly, but he gave no other indication that he had even seen the attack. Rey guided him past the frozen bolt. Once they had safely evaded it, she removed herself from under his arms and after gaining a slight nod from him to let go, she stepped away. Poe, Finn, and Rose has crowded around. She didn't focus on them as she walked back to the bolt. She stood directly in front of the plasma, eyes focused and after a moment, it burst into a Mina tire explosion.

"If anyone tries anything like that, you will answer to me." The words came out calmly but the underlying threat had been made clear.

"I believe you all have work to do," the General's imposing voice rang out. "The time for celebration will come when the war is won."

The crowd dispersed, as Rey returned to Kylo's side.

"I'm sure my uncle will have some words for you for that," he gestured behind them, as she resumed her earlier position.

"Probably."

"Why did you do it?"

She stalled. "It would have hit you."

"I'd survive."

He really was the most infuriating man in the galaxy! "That's not the point."

"What is?"

Rey wanted to scream. She didn't. They were too close to the General and Luke now. She needed to maintain her control.

"Commander Dameron, you've outdone yourself once again," the General welcomed them.

"Thank you, General, but Rose and Finn are the ones responsible for the rescue," Poe explained. "It was their daring that brought us home safe, along with the others."

Rose blushed furiously under Poe's praise. Finn was standing slightly rigid, keeping his eyes anywhere but on Rey or Kylo.

"A thousand thanks to you both," Leia smiles at them. "We will make preparations for a celebration in your honor once you have all been debriefed."

"Thank you, m'am," Finn bowed his head. Rose followed his guide, mumbling something that sounded like 'thank you' before straightening up.

"As for you two," the General turned her attention to Rey and Kylo. "Welcome home." Above her, Kylo twitched uncomfortably. "Let's get inside."

Grateful to be inside, out of the blistering cold weather, Rey followed. She hasn't had time to notice the chill earlier. Her focus had been on keeping Kylo alive. They hadn't made it this far for him to simply be taken down by a blaster.

The General led them all down through a labyrinth of tunnels. Both her and Luke exchanged several glances, but neither spoke a word. Rey regarded their actions curiously, especially when Leia shot her brother a rather defiant look.

 _They are using the Force_ , Kylo's deep timber came across the bond.

 _Twins,_ he reminded her. _Their type of bond is common among Force-sensitives._

_Makes sense. They are the children of Anakin Skywalker._

_Indeed._

Finn, Rose, Poe and the rest of the group went to be debriefed, leaving Rey and Kylo to follow Leia Organa and her brother to her quarters. They entered through the sitting room. It looked rather formal. Rey guessed it was where she hosted a great number of conversations regarding the Resistance. She helped Kylo down into the nearest chair, immediately sitting by him. Her intention was to life his tunic to survey the damage, but his mother spoke first.

"Rey," the General spoke her name warmly, before her eyes shifted to the man who had once been her son. "Ben."

"That's not my name."

"It's the name you were given when you were born."

"That boy is dead," he all but growled.

"That boy," she growled back. "Is you. And you are my son." The way she flashed her teeth as she said it made Rey wonder which parent Kylo had gotten his temper from.

_Both._

_That explains a lot._

_I'm sure it does._ Even in their thoughts, he managed to sigh. Once again, Rey was reminded of the need to check his wound and have it taken care of.

But Leia Organa was not one to back down.

"Ben."

"Don't call me that," he hissed. Rey knew it wasn't wise to back an injured animal into a corner and that seemed to be how this reunion was playing out. Thankfully, Luke intervened.

"Leia, they just arrived. Why don't you let Rey and I take him down to the med bay. He is obviously in pain."

"He'll survive."

Kylo chuckled at Rey's surprised expression, as if to say 'told-you-so.'

"General, we were both injured in taking down Supreme Leader Snoke. Could we have this discussion at a later time, please?"

Leia stares at her, eyes softened slightly. Taking a deep breath, she turned to Luke, then back to Rey. "It appears I am vetoed," she sighed. She waved her hand at them, "Go."

"Thank you, General."

The medbay droids patched her up first. The steps the team on the shuttle had done most of the work, though she would always wear a scar as a reminder of the blast. Once she was done, a droid instructed Kylo to sit in a batch tank for a few hours. The droid continued telling him that after treatment bacta patches would be applied so he would be able to shower and sleep normally. However he was expected to report back in twelve standard hours for a follow-up treatment.

Rey had excused herself while he had undressed, heading out into the hallway where Luke was waiting for her. She pressed her back against the wall, sliding down until she was sitting on the floor across from her once mentor.

"You look as though you expect to be reprimanded."

"That is what is about to happen, isn't it?"

Luke's face broke into a genuine smile. "No."

Rey gave him a wary glance. "Then What is about to happen?"

"You tell me."

He crouched down, mimicking her position in the floor, which cause a small smile to form on her face. Watching the legendary Jedi slump to the floor was one of the things she had never imagined she'd witness in this galaxy or the next. It took him a moment, his aged limbs stiff, but eventually he was down at her height.

"What do you think will happen while Ben is here?" Luke pressed. She let her head fall back, turning over the question in her mind. "Your feelings aside, Rey, he has hurt a lot of people."

"I know," she told him, gearing up for a fight. "I was one of them, in case you forgot."

"I haven't. Have you?"

"I thought you'd be pleased he was back," she retorted, ignoring the underlying question.

"I am."

"You don't sound it."

"Do not misunderstand, Rey. Ben being back here is for the best. I failed him before. I told you he failed me because I was too blind to see my own short-comings. I owe him a debt...a debt I intend to repay."

"Then why are you acting this way?"

"Your Force bond to him is dangerous."

"What? Why?"

"There has never been a bond like this before. Siblings, lovers, master and apprentice — those bonds are formed after years of training and time to build trust between both individuals," Luke explained. "The bond Ben shares with you has never been documented before. It may be a singular occurrence."

"That doesn't mean it's dangerous!"

"Do you know how to control it?"

"We managed to end Snoke," she pointed out, avoiding the question.

She didn't want to answer Luke. Of course she didn't. Kylo didn't either, not that they had had ample time to research it and work on a solution. They had been too busy training, fighting to survive. Once they were both healed, they could start looking. They would find the answers. She was sure of it.

Luke ran his good hand through his hair, sighing. "You both are naturally gifted, stronger than I ever was, possibly stronger than even my father, but what happened with Snoke was fortunate. It could have gone badly for both of you."

"But it didn't," she insisted.

"But it didn't," he agreed, grudgingly.

"You want me to leave the base?"

"No," Luke shook his head. "I want you to train Ben."

Rey had not been expecting that. How was she supposed to train him? He was far more advanced than she was. He had years of skilled practice and multiple masters under his belt. He didn't need to learn anything from a Scavenger.

"He does."

"What? What am I going to teach him?"

"How to come home."

She opened her mouth to protest. How could she teach him something she had never done? She hadn't gone home. Hadn't been back to Jakku since meeting B.B.-8 and Finn. Her own parents hadn't wanted her, leaving her on that desolate, barren world. Why would she go back? And what would that teach Kylo?

"Jakku is no longer your home."

Rey understood what he meant as his words came out. Here. The Resistance. Training with the Force. The Falcon. It had all become part of her, a home away from home. Her friends were here. Her training could continue here. It was all right in front of her —-everything she had ever wanted. This was her home now.

"You want me to train him, make him comfortable here." Luke nodded. "Then why are you warning me about our bond and about him?"

"He responds to you, Rey. He won't give Leia and I the same reaction. He needs it to come from you, but..." he trailed off.

"But?"

"But I don't want this to become a burden on you. Don't become lost in this mission. His redemption is his own path. As much as you can help, you can't make the choice for him."

"He already made the choice!" She found herself almost yelling in frustration. "He saved my life. Why is that so hard for everyone to believe?"

"Why is it so easy for you?"

"Because I-." Rey stopped herself. _I what? I like him? I care about him? I lo-. No, no that isn't possible._ She pushed the last thought down as far as she could and landed on a compromise. "Because I think he deserves a second chance."

"We do too," Leia appeared aside of her. Rey wasn't surprised the General hadn't stayed away for long. She was surprised how stealthy she was. "I will be reconvening with the council this evening to discuss the terms of Ben's residence on the base. They may ask for him to speak on his own behalf, but I believe their intention is to-."

"They can't execute him," Rey interrupted. Leia and Luke both gave her a strange look. "That's what he thinks is going to happen. After the attack on the flight deck, I happen to agree with him."

"It is a possibility they will ask for justice. Ben does need to answer for his crimes."

"Killing him isn't justice."

"No," Luke agreed, sadly. "It is not."

"Your beliefs as Jedi will not sway the council," Leia admitted. "Each member of the council has lost someone due to the First Order's rule. They will not be satisfied without some form of penance."

"What will you propose?" Luke asked his sister.

"Confinement to the base, providing all intel he can on the First Orders plans and safe holdings, coupled with a year-long period of probation."

"He will need to be monitored by a handler." Luke commented, offhandedly.

"Rey," the General turned towards her again. "I have already asked so much of you. I know it is not fair to ask mo-."

"I'll do it," she responded without hesitation.

General Organa's face broke into a relieved smile. "Thank you, Rey."

"You're welcome, General."

"I'll see to it you are assigned quarters close to one another, near the old storage bay. It should work as an adequate training room for you both."

"Thank you," Rey nodded in approval.

Leia and Luke took their leave, giving her some space to think over her decision. She understood how challenging it would be, tying herself to Kylo when practically everyone else on the base, her new home, wanted him as dead as Snoke. Rey could deal with their harsh glares and inability to understand, as long as her friends were still with her.

She needed to talk to Finn.

Rey found him in the mess hall with Poe and Rose. There was another girl she had seen around the base too.

"Rey!" Finn jumped up from his seat, upon seeing her. His earlier indifference gone now that she had come to face him alone. He pulled her into s tight hug. "Did they check you out? Are you ok?"

"I'm fine," she reassured him, as she hugged him back.

"Good," he breathed, stepping back slightly as he released her. "I was so worried. When I found you with him I was sure he had been the one to-."

"No," Rey held up a hand. "No, Finn. He saved me. If he hadn't done what he did, I wouldn't be here right now. I owe him my life."

Finn didn't seem to know how to process those words. He stood stone still in front of her, as if she had just told him she was considering becoming a tauntaun farmer.

"Rey," he began slowly, "I know you think he has changed, but-."

"He has," she snapped. "He has changed, Finn. I thought you of all people would understand. He went through horrible things, terrible things that led him down the wrong path. If you understood, you'd know. You'd know he didn't have a choice. Knowing what i know now, I can't say I blame him."

"What?" Poe nearly choked on his dinner. He had been listening quietly the entire time, keeping out of their squabble. Now he stood up, coming up on Finn's side.

"He's brainwashed you, Rey," Finn continued trying to coax her. "You can't see how twisted he is. He's using you."

Rey shook her head, tears pricking at the corners of her eyes. She had been foolish for thinking they would be on her side — their side — of things.

"Rey," Finn was basically pleading now. "Come sit with us and have something to eat. I know you can pack it down better than anyone."

He tried to make her laugh, tried to lighten the mood. Rey couldn't bring herself to smile, not when she felt as if the ground was being ripped out from underneath her feet. Hadn't Luke just made her realize this was her home? She was losing her safety net all over again.

"You can sit next to Jessika," Poe offered, joining in the effort. "Pava is one of my best pilots."

"One?" The girl arched an eyebrow at Poe.

Rey barely heard the rest. Food didn't seem appealing at the moment. She was feeling sick, uneasy. Her friends had turned on her, the way everyone on base had turned on Kylo the moment he walked off the shuttle. After what she had accomplished for the Resistance, she had anticipated more people would believe her. _Foolish_ , she thought, _foolish little girl. Your own friends don't even believe you._

"I have to go," she mumbled, turning to leave.

"Without dinner?" Finn cried, incredulously.

"I have somewhere I need to be."

"With him?"

"Yes, I volunteered to be his handler while he serves out his probation on the base."

"What?!"

"Just thought I'd let me friends know." She let the final words come out with all the venom she had, before walking out.

 _Guess it's just you and me_ , she thought when she arrived back at the med bay to pick up Kylo. _Why are we always stuck together?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I FINALLY saw TLJ and...wow! There were a few things I didn't like but overall I was really impressed and my shipper heart is still recovering. Thanks for all of the support for this story so far. I have loved Reylo from the beginning but I'm new to writing for this fandom, so I appreciate all the kind thoughts. If you are on tumblr, I'm @wewantreylo


	3. Part III

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The final part

Training with Rey at Hoth was different than training at the First Order base. The room the General had reserved was not meant for their needs. While the old hangar hadn't been either, he had put in work orders to have it adapted when he was sure she would join him. It appeared his mother had not given as much forethought. At the very least it provided a quiet, open space for them to run drills. Rey kept the doors closed while they worked. She claimed it was for their safety, so they could focus on the training. He knew better. It was so she didn't have to spend all her time defending him against those who still didn't want him on the base.

His probation was very lenient. He knew Leia Organa had fought for several days to get him his own room in exchange for his testimony and providing intel on all First Order dealings, recruitment procedures, known bases, etc. He was aware both Rey and his uncle had used the Force to coax the members of the council to side with the General. He didn't bother asking why. Rey had told him she was assigned to him, as his handler, the day they had arrived. He had wanted to ask her if she had drawn the short straw, a phrase his father had picked up while smuggling. One of the few things he had taught him. At the time, her aura had been off, so it had gone unsaid.

A quick peek into her mind when she had retrieved him from the med bay had granted him access to her recent memories. FN-2187 had hurt her. When Kylo dug deeper for the reason, he no longer needed to question her. She had chosen him. Even after he had failed to protect her, even after she had lashed out at him for hiding his wounds, even after all the atrocities he had committed — she chose him.

Why?

It was the only question he still found himself asking. It constantly tugged at his mind, causing him to analyze every move Rey made in training. He began to notice how her tone of voice changed when she spoke to him. He noticed she never followed him inside the medical chambers when he went in for his routine check-up, even though she was supposed to be with him at all times. There were so many inconsistencies in her behavior. It left him puzzled.

As the days turned into weeks and the weeks turned into months, he found her to be even more challenging to define. While she never shirked away from her duties — constantly with him unless he was at the doctor or confined to his bedroom for the evening — she started to keep up her mental shields more, blocking him from her thoughts at all times. When he raised the observation to her during a training session, she told him he didn't need to be in her head, that is served no value. He disagreed strongly, feeling their bond should be leveraged when coordinating attacks against them. She hadn't had a strong rebuttal, but he had dropped it. He didn't want to argue with her.

About four months into his year-long sentence, the unsettled Resistance members had lost the fire in their attempts to have him booted off world, or worse, executed. Rey had become lax in her need to keep the doors closed when they sparred. It was on one such day, a child appeared. She was small, probably around five or six. She stood in the doorway, a large gap framing her body and causing her to appear even tinier. He and Rey were too enthralled in their combat to take notice at first. She cleared her throat, a respectful interruption she must have learned from her guardians. Rey dropped her staff, instantly upon identifying the youngling.

"Hi," the girl chirped, cheerily.

"Hello," Rey moved to kneel down in front of her. "What's your name?"

"Gigette," the girl responded, shyly.

Her eyes had flickered to Kylo, as he approached, leaving his weapon behind. He had limited experience when it came to children. He would trust Rey's instincts on how best to handle their audience.

"Are you two married?" she asked, gazing up at them with innocent eyes.

Kylo adored the blush that instantly erupted across Rey's face. Her freckles disappeared under the color. He had to work to keep his smirk from growing into a full blown smile. He wasn't sure what he found more amusing, the unsuspecting child's question or Rey's reaction.

"You are making sounds like my parents," Gigette continued. "They usually make those sounds when they are alone in their room too." He could feel Rey's burning cheeks through the bond, as her embarrassment flared to a whole new level. The girl was oblivious. "Mama says only married people should make those kind of sounds."

"Did she now?" Rey asked, straightening up quickly. Too quickly. She teetered off balance. Kylo snaked an arm around her waist, drawing her towards him until they were hip to hip. While she appeared thankful for his help in catching her, her blush had now spread down her neck below her clothing. He was unable to resist the urge to push her over the edge. He wanted to see where this conversation would go and if it would offer up any answers to her strange behavior.

"Yes," the girl nodded. "So are you? Married?"

"No!" Rey practically squeaked.

"Why not?"

Rey didn't have a response for that one. Kylo wasn't sure if he was pleased or not. Her face was still a beautiful shared of scarlet, though he was convinced she would be beautiful no matter what color her skin was. He hadn't been building her up with false pretense when he told her she was his equal. She was — in every way.

Marriage was not a concept he had spent much time considering in the past. He had never seen a successful union. His parents, while passionate, were too selfish to sincerely commit to one another. The sparks between them had engulfed them, burning hot and bright, before dimming into mere embers of their initial relationship. It was a failure he did not want to add to his list. Being bound to another individual for the remainder of his days sounded constricting. A tie of such magnitude would require he be concerned about said person's safety, how happy they were, what they needed from him, how he could help them, how—- Kylo stopped.

He already had that relationship…with Rey. Thanks to the Force bond, he was connected to her indefinitely. He felt her moods, knew what she needed (sometimes before even she was aware) and he was already concerned for her. Another realization hit him. It didn't bother him. It never had. Their bond had never felt uncomfortable for him. While her instinct was to reject the bond in the beginning, he had calmly embraced it, treating it as the gift it was.

Kylo stared at Rey, who was fighting hard to control her emotions. She was every thing to him. She was his bond made, his trainer/trainee, his handler, and his friend. The last term did not sit well with him. He didn't want to be her friend. He wanted to be more than her friend. He wanted to be hers. He wanted her to be his.

Is that was a real marriage is?

"Don't you love each other?" Gigette sprung another question on them. It brought his attention back to the inquisitive child. Rey was at a loss for words. She was struggling to answer the previous question. The new one wasn't much easier to handle.

"Do you think we love each other?" Kyle returned.

"Yep," she replied, happily.

"Why?" Rey's incredulous outburst could not be missed.

"You look at each other funny."

"What?"

"It's the way Mama and Papa look at each other, even when they are mad. Mama says it's love."

Kylo expected Rey to combust from the depth of her mortification. Instead, she knelt back down to the girl's height, removing herself from his light hold. He noticed the instant her warm body left his hand. He tried to not overthink it. "Your mama is a wise woman," Rey told the child, kindly. "Where is your mother? You shouldn't be wandering around the base alone."

As if on cue, one of the line cooks from the mess hall came running in, out of breath from what appeared to be a frantic search. "Gigette!"

"Mama!"

"I was so worried." The woman enveloped the girl in a tight hug. After checking her daughter over, she raised her eyes up to look at Rey and Kylo. Rey was already back to her normal height, having straightened up when the woman entered. "I'm sorry if she has bothered you."

"It was no trouble," Rey assured her.

"I try to keep any eye on her when I'm in the kitchen, but with lessons postponed until a new instructor can be found, I've had to pull double-duty." She took a deep breath and sighed. As she looked at them, realization dawned on her. "You're the Jedi?"

"Rey." Kylo watched as she extended her hand for the woman to shake.

He mimicked her gesture. "Ben Solo." Saying his birth name out loud surprised Rey nearly as much as he surprised himself. He hadn't had the intention of using it. The name just slipped out.

The woman's eyebrows nearly went into her hair. "Han's son?"

"The very same," Rey nodded, practically beaming.

"I thought you were-."

"Not anymore," he interrupted.

The woman nodded, thoughtfully. "I'm Val Ziggz," she introduced herself. "You've already met Gigette."

"Yes," Rey gave a small wave to the young girl, who was now holding her mother's hand.

"I need to be getting back, but it was nice to met you," she paused for a moment, then added, "Both of you." As she walked back up to the higher level, her daughter in tow, Rey rounded on him.

"So it's Ben now, huh?"

He shrugged, wanting to appear as indifferent as possible. "It's my name."

"I know," she nearly snorted, trying to contain a laugh. "Why the sudden change?"

"I thought you liked 'Ben'."

"I do."

"Then it's Ben."

"Just like that?"

"Just like that."

They finished their forms together. Her blush had disappeared, but Kylo…Ben…found she was still distracted. Her movements weren't as precise as before. She kept biting her bottom lip. Clearly, she was thinking on something. He wished she trusted him enough to tell him what it was. He tried to concentrate on his own movements. He fell into the routine easily and allowed his muscle memory to do all the work, while his mind ran over the fantasy of them being married to one another.

Together.

* * *

Rey was swept into a nightmare. She felt the heat of anger flowing through her. An uncomfortable clenching had her chest tight and she had the distinct feeling as though she had lost something very important. The annoyance she had for the sensation clouded her vision with black tendrils, the Dark side of the Force, she realized. The Smokey wisps of the energy curled around her Force signature, weaving through the silvery gray cord.

Odd, she had always seen her Force signature as a brilliant gold, matching the sands of Jakku.

"Ben!"

The voice that called out in the dark was familiar. The tightness in her chest increased as her eyes fell to Han Solo, approaching her. The scene unfolded quickly, the all too familiar ambiance of the Starkiller base coming into focus.

Rey shook her head, frozen in her spot. This was wrong. She could see the front of his face as he advanced. The angle of she had witnessed was from further up and behind. Then she realized.

This wasn't her nightmare.

 _Ben_ , she reached out to him, but there was no response. His mental barriers were still up. _Ben, wake up. It's not real. It's a dream._

The nightmare continued, dragging her back into the haunting memory. Father and son spoke, each with a bit of a bite to their words and each with an even deeper conviction. Rey's eyes began to water at the defeat in her childhood hero's face, as he came to realize what was about to happen. Seconds later, the red lightsaber roared to light and Han reached forward. His fingers grazed her cheek, Ben's cheek, before he fell away forever.

Instantly, a pain so violent and so deeply rooted sprung up from her core, once again blacking out her vision until all she could see was the Force signature and the ebony coils of the Dark side. She expected the coils to strangle the silver cord, block out all the Light left in it and consume it completely. Instead, she watched in awe as the coils teased and poked at the cord, drawing back each time they touched, as if burned by the contact.

That was when Chewbacca's plasma crossbow fired. Physical pain tore through her abdomen, which she instinctively grabbed at, even though it was only a dream. She fell to her knees. The stench of melting skin and scorched fabric invaded her nose, causing her to almost retch. But it was the look in the wookie's eyes, as she raised her head up that made her stomach give one final turn before she had to bite back the bile rising in her throat. A look of utter disgust laced with disappointment.

Rey broke out of the nightmare, clawing and kicking at her sheets. She had to get to Ben. Not bothering to put on her socks or boots, she left her room to run barefoot down the hall to where his chamber was, still locked from when she had dropped him off earlier. Without hesitation, she keyed in the entry code and stepped into the unlit room.

Ben was strewn across the bed, sheets a tangled mess around his elongated limbs. She had felt him have nightmares before. It had woken her up on more than one occasion — either the pain or the overwhelming fear. It had always been sent to her as flashes of intense emotions. Never had they been strong enough to draw her in, past his shields, and in to his own experience. Their bond must be growing.

Pushing the thought aside, Rey went to him, kneeling in front of his bed. "Ben?" He didn't wake. "Ben, it's me, Rey," she moved her hand toward his face to brush his hair back, when his own hand shot forward with surprising speed. He caught her wrist, yanking sharply as he sat up, his legs nearly knocking into her as he swung them over the side of the bed.

"Ben!"

Her cry startled him, as his sleep-heavy eyes took in her form. "Rey," he wheezed, as if finally realizing who she the next instant, he dropped her wrist, dropping his head into his hands. "I'm so sorry." He didn't sound like himself. His words came out barely above a whisper.

"It's over now," she told him, stepping in between his legs. She wrapped her arms around his broad shoulders, letting his head rest against her stomach. She worked her fingers through his hair, gently massaging his scalp, trying to send soothing energy through the bond. "It was only a dream."

"But it was real. I did that to him."

"Han forgave you," she insisted. "I saw it in his eyes. He knew what was going to happen. He had accepted it. He loved you."

"He never told me."

Rey paused in her movements. The brief time she had spent with Han had demonstrated he wasn't a man for words. He was a man of action. There was a reason he had been a galaxy-renowned smuggler and a rebellion fighter, to boot. He didn't consider the risks. He took them. He was the type to dive head first into something, no questions asked. It wasn't difficult for her to envision him as a reluctant father, unsure how to act at every turn as his son grow up.

"He didn't have to," she responded with a sigh. "He showed you."

Kylo's arms rode up her back, causing her night-shift to catch slightly as it rose above her knees. He placed his palms flat against her, holding her close. His breathing was more even now, less frantic. He shifted his forehead up, pressing his nose against her waist. Rey felt the twinge of the tickling sensation and willed herself not to flinch, understanding how even as innocent as the reaction was to her, it would set him back.

His hands clung to her. It was as if she was the only thing keeping him there — his only connection to this place and time. When she had looked into his eyes, all she could see was the young boy, so scared and utterly alone, just like she had been. She saw herself in him.

After months of being side by side, months of denying how she felt, months of burying her emotions and building a wall around herself, she let go. She needed to let him know he wasn't alone. He had someone who loved him. Her. She loved him.

"Ben." Her voices sounded faint.

He shifted to meet her gaze. The hurt was still there. But there was another emotion now, just beneath the surface. Rey leaned down, before she could lose her nerve. Cupping his face in her hands, she placed her lips against his. There was a ripple of shock. He froze. Rey felt a sickening feeling swell up from her stomach. Had she made a mistake? Quickly, she took a step back, dropping her hands. "I-I'm sorry. I-."

Before she was able to finish her apology, he was on her. He caught her wrists, pulling her back to him with such force, she landed in his lap with a squeak. She stared at him, confused. His eyes were trained on hers. They were a delicious chocolate hue, drawing her in. It was intoxicating really. She believed she could get lost in those eyes and the new spare within them. There was no longer the lost boy. No. He had been replaced by a man. A man with a very clear idea of what he wanted.

Her.

Wordlessly, he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. Then he moved forward, returning the gentle kiss she had deposited a minute before. Rey felt her body become run over by flames. She had felt a similar burning a couple of weeks before when they had met Gigette.

The questions the youngling had asked had prompted some very interesting and graphic fantasies in Rey's head. She had been scared of Ben sensing it through the bond, focusing harder than normal on her barriers to ensure that did not happen. Now, she wondered what would have happened if she hadn't kept him out.

She moved her hands to his face, trailing her fingers along the strong arch of his chin, up his jawbone, past his ears to tangle in his hair. He had kept it long. She was glad he had. She liked the length, the way it framed his features.

Ben moved his mouth away from hers. Rey stilled when she felt his lips against the pulse point on her neck. She let out a breathy sigh. The heat rolling over her. She tilted her head to the side, proving him with more access, and her with the appropriate angle to take the bottom of his ear into her mouth.

Catching the flesh between her teeth, she lightly bit, then sucked on his earlobe. Ben's breath hitched, prompting her to continue. She ran the tip of her tongue along the length of his ear, before nibbling at the damp flesh again. His hands on her waist slid to her hips, pushing her down against him.

Rey had never been with a man before. The only knowledge she had of sex was from a few holovids and the trash talk she had heard at the cantinas in Jakku, neither of which described what she was feeling by being with Ben. Uncertainty over what to do next crept in, stalking her movements. Ben pulled back, causing her to look at him.

"I've never done this before," she admitted, scared about how he would react.

"Yeah, me either."

She wasn't sure what she had expected. She knew he had been training with Luke prior to joining the First Order. The Jedi has strict codes about attachments, specifically romantic ones. She found it hard to believe Snoke would have permitted such frivolous activities either. Still, she was unprepared for his confession.

"Do you...," she bent her lip back with her teeth, hesitating to finish her question. "Do you want to stop?"

"Do you?"

Rey searched his face. There was longing there, a hunger. He looked at her the way she had seen some loth cats stare down their prey before they attacked. Deeper down though, she could sense where his feelings were rooted. It made her heart beat quicken. She found her answer there.

"No."

The tension disappeared instantly. He graced her with a smile, one of the rare ones she had earned in all their time together. "Then, I think," he tugged playfully at her nightshift, "this needs to go."

"Mmmmhmm."

In one swift movement, she had pulled the sleeping garment over her head and tossed it aside, leaving her in her standard issued Resistance breast band and underwear. Ben's eyes scanned her nearly naked form, before coming back to her face. "You're beautiful," he whispered, placing his hands on either side of her face. He kissed her again, more confidently this time.

He added a slight amount of pressure. Rey opened her mouth to tell him to discard his clothes. It was only fair. Her words died away when his tongue ran over hers. She let out a moan against him. Once again, he pressed down on her. Her hips rolled forward instinctively and it was he who moaned next.

"Your turn," she pulled on the hem of his shirt. He obeyed, discarding the shirt. "And these," she ran her thumb and forefinger over the lip of his pants. Ben let out a guttural growl, his hand capturing hers. Her touch had been light, playful, but it he erupted a fire in him. His need was more pressing now, more desperate. Setting her to the side, he yanked his pants off, revealing all of him in his bare form.

Rey couldn't keep her eyes from him. She had an idea of what to expect. Seeing it for herself destroyed all expectations. His pale skin was littered with scars of varying sizes and shapes. Underneath was pure muscle. His entire form was lean strength. He was perfect. Her thoughts must have carried through the bond. He shied away from her gaze, momentarily, a light flush erupting across his cheeks and the tips of his ears.

She ran a finger down his arm. "Ben," she coaxed, gently. "Don't hide from me." When he didn't respond, she leaned forward, placing a soft kiss on his shoulder, then another on his collarbone, and a final one against his chest, just over his heart. A spark was emitted from the sensual contact.

In the next instant, his hands were on her, wrenching her undergarments off so she matched his state of undress. His eyes drank her in, once more, skimming over every inch of flesh. Rey felt uneasy, not sure how she compared with others or his own expectations. "Perfect," he echoed her earlier appraisal.

Gingerly, he nudged her back, until she was lying down with her head against his pillow. He crawled over top of her, keeping his weight supported on his forearms. Rey reached up, locking her hands together behind him, where his head met his neck. "I love you," she confessed, watching his face carefully for a reaction. She was scared of what it meant to say those words. Being together this way, so intimately was one thing. It was a step she had never considered taking before. However, opening herself up to be rejected and cast aside again — like how her parents had done — was even more terrifying.

"Rey-." Ben was staring at her. His eyes had taken on a misty quality. He shifted his weight, so he could cup her face with one hand. "I've been falling in love with you since the moment I saw you on Takodana. I fall in love with you more each day. I never want to be parted from you. Ever."

There was a thick lump in her throat she couldn't swallow. Rey felt her eyes welling up with tears. He loved her. He wanted to stay with her. Always. Her parents hadn't loved her. They had deserted her on a trash heap of a planet. Unkar hadn't loved her. He only wanted her to scavenge for him. Finn had grown to love her, but he had left her for a time. Han was gone. Luke had turned his back on her for a time. Everyone was always leaving. But not Ben.

Ben had never lied to her. He had chosen her. He had protected her. He had been there for her, though sometimes in an unforeseen way. Perhaps it was the will of the Force or perhaps he was simply the missing piece in her life. Either way, she believed him wholly.

Carding her fingers through his hair, she brought him down to kiss him. When their lips met, the desire from both their sides heightened. Ben dropped between her knees, delicately pushing her legs apart. He sunk down, resting a portion of his weight against her, as he positioned himself at her entrance. Rey ran one of her hands down his smooth skin to his shoulder blade, gripping onto it, in anticipation.

He pulled back, so that his forehead was resting against her chin, as he slid into her. Rey's fingers tightened around his shoulder, the others twining in his hair with a abrupt yank. There was a slight discomfort, a pressure due to his size. He halted.

"Do you-."

"No," she breathed. "Keep going. Please."

With one quick thrust, he entered her, filling her completely. Rey bit the inside of her cheek to tear her mind off the pain. She had heard from female travelers at the output, the first time could be unpleasant. She hadn't wanted to concern herself with those warnings. Now, she understood them to be true. The earlier burn of passion had subsided, leaving her with an ache. Ben was wary of her expression and started to pull out.

As he did, the fervor returned, seeking more contact. Rey loosened her hold, giving him a brief nod. He drove into her once more, a bit faster this time. She sighed, contently. He continued with his steady pace. Stars. Rey felt him expanding her. As the pain dulled, she could feel every vein, every pulse of his flesh against hers. She let out a moan of pure pleasure.

The sound elated Ben, who accelerated his pace, causing Rey's small form to begin jostling back and forth on the mattress. She found her hips bucking against his own to match his rhythm. Ben dropped his head, stealing kiss after kiss from her as he rutted into her. As they reached their climaxes, Rey felt the earlier pressure return with a new force. But it felt different this time. When it rolled over her, like a wave crashing onto the shore, she let out a cry of bliss, which was nearly overcome by Ben's own outburst.

He collapsed on top of her, his head nestled in the crook of her neck. As they both wrestled to catch their breaths, he turned his face just enough to plant a kiss on her temple.

"I love you," he repeated, before succumbing to sleep.

Rey smiled, stroking his hair back from his face. "I know."

They fell asleep tangled up in each other's arms.

Together.

* * *

One year later, Rey and Ben were standing together in the forest in Takodana. Ben was anxious. He hadn't felt so out of control since General Hux had found him on the dying Starkiller base in the snow. He had been growing increasingly worried over the last couple of weeks. Rey had been uncharacteristically quiet. At first he thought it was due to the fact he had proposed and immediately his mother had gone into wedding planning overdrive. Honestly, it was all the woman ever talked about.

Since Rey had no blood relatives, he could understand her apprehension about guest lists, family traditions, and other topics that came up with planning the wedding. If he had had his way, they'd do it right now, here in this forest, without another living soul to see. But his mother — the Princes, Senator, General, whatever she wanted to be called these days — had other plans. And did she have plans.

"This is where you first met me and where I first met you."

He chuckled, despite himself. "I made a great first impression."

"Hardly."

Her tone was not playful, as he had expected. He deadpanned. Was he missing the bigger picture? Was this more than wedding jitters? Was she conflicted over her decision to marry him? Did she wish she hadn't said yes?

"Either way. It was rather memorable."

"I'm hoping this is too."

Ben forgot to breathe. If she was having cold-feet about the wedding, ending their relationship here would have a poetic symmetry to it. He didn't want to hear what she had to say, already convinced he knew what she was about to tell him. Why else would she shut him out of their bond? What reason could she possibly have for disappearing at all hours of the day and lying to him? Even without their bond he knew she was keeping a secret locked away. She had never been a good liar. Her face always fell slightly when she kept information from him. In the beginning, he had found it endearing. Now, he took it as a confirmation of his greatest fear.

He had lost her.

"Rey-."

"Let me finish," she insisted.

"I know what you're going to say," he tried again to prevent her from vocalizing the rejection.

Her eyes flickered with fear. He can feel when she uses the Force to peer into his mind. He doesn't try to stop her. He is defeated. Too broken under the weight of what is to come to fight it anymore.

He should have known better. She was pure light. She had always been his redemption, his one true North, as Han would have said. She had saved him. Her debt was paid. She owed him nothing. If anything, he owed her everything. She had freed him from Snoke, brought him back to the light, helped end the war, stood by him while he patched things up with his mother and uncle before he made a mess of things with his last living relatives. She deserved better than him. He should have never proposed.

"Benjamin Organa Solo," her voice took on a sharp tone he hadn't heard her use in a long time.

Ben found it in him to meet her gaze. "Give me your hand," she said, reaching toward him. Her order was soft, inviting even. He swallowed the lump growing in his throat, before he dropped his large hand into her two open palms. She brought it down to rest just below her belly button. He raised a brow at her. He had expected her to return the engagement band he had presented her with.

He started to ask what she was doing. Before he could, she opened up her side of the bond.

He was overcome with light. It was the brightest he had ever seen, even outshining her own.

What?

It took him a while to process what he was seeing…what he was feeling. Even once he registered the source, he can't believe it. It wasn't until Rey spoke again, he was able to wrap his mind around her secret, around the surprise she had been struggling to keep from him until the time was right. She had been hiding, had been sneaking off. She had been delaying the news until she could find a way to bring him here. She wanted it to be special for him.

"Ben, meet our daughter, Kira."

_Our daughter._

_Our._

Responses formed, then fell. He couldn't put together an adequate response. Like a fool, he stood there staring at his hand on her lower abdomen. Her stomach was still flat, as it has only been a few weeks. She had yet to start showing, but the life force signature was there, plain as day. His face broke into a huge grin. Words couldn't do it justice, so he removed his hand, lifting her up and spinning her around as he hugged her close, all the while kissing her cheeks, her hair, every where he could manage as he moved.

Ben had wanted her from the moment he saw her. He had wanted them to be together. It had been the driving factor behind countless decisions, the reason he had taken so many risks, fought as hard as he had. In the end, nothing mattered as long as he was with Rey. She was his. He was hers.

_It's just us now._

His words from years earlier had echoed in his mind. How short-sighted he had been. He had assumed it would always be the two of them. He had never considered the possibility of a family. Suddenly the word took on a new meaning. And it delighted him.

Together.

* * *

 **A/N:** And that's all folks! I have a couple other Reylo fics ("Opening Night" and "Wish That You Were Here") uploaded. I'm thinking of starting a longer fic, an AU about Ben and Rey being martial arts instructors at his uncle's Ahch-To dojo. Does that sound interesting to anyone?

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: This was written before I saw TLJ. I wrote it as part of a Tumblr prompt. I'm editing Part II. It should be up shortly.


End file.
